JANET JACKSON'S TIT
I was reading on Yahoo that there is a public "watchdog" group that is launching an in-depth investigation to determine exactly how Janet Jackson's juggs got on national television. I'm going to take a wild guess and say that it probably happened when the gay guy from N'Sync ripped the thing covering the tit from the general tit region.

Obviously this is just another excuse for a bunch of horny guys to get together and watch a slow motion titty video 100,000 times. "Back, and to the left. Back, and to the left"

I CAN'T RELATE TO GEORGE BUSH
Seriously man, what was all that about Iraq seeking "Weapons of Mass Destruction-Related Program Activities and Significant Amounts of Equipment"? Jesus Christ, is that a mouthful or what? Imagine talking to other dictators and being all, "We don't have WMD's but we have a fucking shitload of WMDRPASAEs."

The other dictators would be all, "uh, whatever, dick."

The president I like was Clinton. The only thing he pursued was Blow Job-Related Activities, and the only place he had Significant Amounts of Equipment, was in his pants.

THIS AIN'T YOUR DADDY'S PUNK'D
Every time I watch the three episodes they made of that show (and only on MTV is three episodes "a season"), it's the same "Yo bitch, you got punk'd" line at the end of the prank. Well now that the show's been cancelled, I've thought of all these good alternatives.

Friendly: Excuse me, bitch? I regret to inform you that you've been punk'd.

Passive-Aggressive: You want me to say you didn't get punk'd? Fine. I mean you did, but fine, whatever. I don't care either way.

Evasive: You don't even want to know what you just got got'd.

Double Negative: Let me put it this way, bitch. You didn't NOT get punk'd.

Excessive: Yo bitch not only did you get punk'd, but you are ugly'd and fat'd and you have no friends'd. Sucks to be you, amigo.

Supernatural: I see a tragic event in late August. There is a name like "Tim" or maybe "Tom". Is this making sense? I see wings... maybe a bird? Oh, your husband Tom died in a plane crash last Summer? Well Tom says "Yo bitch, you got punk'd!"

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