CORN MO'S EUROPEAN TOUR DIARY

Friday, August 2

• Riptide
• Who's The Boss?
• Hart to Hart
• Married With Children
• Charmed

I can enjoy about 5 minutes of these shows in German and then I have to change the channel. I feel like a moron not knowing the language. The voice of Tony Danza sounds like Tony Danza but a German Tony Danza. Danza.

So, I see some performers today, yes?

Tom Bolton-clown act from New York

Tom Tock-German juggler who told me English jokes and German jokes that fucking killed me.

Andy-Austrailian juggler who cracks me up.

Peter-Slack rope walker from Berkeley. Real nice.

The hotel has a free breakfast and it's amazing:

• 6 different kinds of muesli (It's easy to make fun of but it tastes really good. No lie.)
• 4 different kinds of bread including pretzel bread.
• a good fruit bowl
• 4 yogurts
• soft-boiled eggs
• lots of cheeses
• cold cuts
• pickles
• juices
• coffee, teas, sweeteners
• nutella
• jellies

We did 2 shows and the crowds are awesome. I've never seen so many people watch street performers.

Thursday, August 1

Though I love this place, this is how fucked up Switzerland is:

• I can get a work permit as an artist and work as a prostitute
• I can buy pot at the store
• I can walk around Zurich with an open container of alcohol but I can't take a shower after 11:00 pm
• The neighbors can call the cops.

I can't wait to see "COPS" in Switzerland.

***