Dennis is not a licensed physician or even helpful in any way. Having said that, here are his answers to your questions!

Q: Does the stomach shrink when you eat less?
A: Stomachs are wily! Mark my words: if you’re not in the business of tending to your stomach, it’s liable to shrink up like an adolescent child caught in the powerful beam of a shrinking machine.

Human beings, however, are bound to make the mistake of eating less eventually. If you happen to eat less at some point or another, and you find yourself on the short end of the stomach-stick, simply reverse the powerful beam of an everyday shrinking machine, beam your stomach, and promise to never eat less again. While you’re at it, beam yourself some gigantic grub. Now gigantically dig in!

Q: Why do men have a more prominent Adam’s apple, and what is it for?
A: A man’s Adam’s apple is too macho to hide within the larynx the way a female might seek cover, or cower in fear at the sight of a spider or moth. A man’s Adam’s apple is for man-things like hunting, fishing, arm/thumb wrestling, canoeing and coping with night terrors.

Q: Are people getting taller on average?
A: Yes!

Q: When you lose weight, do you lose fat cells?
A: No! This is why a fat person can never really be thin. Even the most successful diet or exercise program is useless to someone like Fatty McFatso. Time may heal all wounds, but fat is forever. Just ask my dad, Fatty McFatso.

Q: How do you treat a bee sting?
A: Is the bee sting welcome? Are you fond of the bee sting? Do you and the bee sting have some sort of complicated history that I should know about before answering your query?

In most cases, a bee sting is unwanted, unloved and inflexible. If this is the case, treat the bee sting as you would treat an uninvited guest. Think of the bee sting as an intruder. Nickname the bee sting “mother in law” and deal with it as such. Do not offer to help it with its bags. Aim to give it only short or misleading answers to its stupid questions. Pretend to busy yourself with housework whenever it’s near. And most of all, pray to your God that your wife doesn’t end up looking like it.

Q: What color is blood when it is inside the body? It looks blue through the veins.
A: The color of blood inside the body does not have a common name. Scientists have determined, however, that the color is a shade lighter than oil shale, but two shades darker than nimbus fluff. Surprised!?!?!?

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