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THE BABOON KNEW!
by Sad Banjo

This is a letter I received from Weber while he was on vacation, with an introduction he wrote upon his return. Enjoy!

I just returned from a holiday I spent in South Africa. Below, I have detailed one of the many adventures I experienced during my two weeks on the dark continent. Without ruining anything, it involves a Baboon Attack!!!

One item I failed to discuss in this letter was how the Denton, Texas music scene helped me thru this encounter. The Baboon was coming right at me and in his eye I saw a glimpse of recognition and he turned off and headed down the beach in search of less friendly prey.

I realize now that the glimpse of recognition was my T-shirt. The classic Centro-Matic "Sumo" T-shirt (in orange). Those not familiar with the Denton music scene may be confused as to why this T-shirt gave me an advantage with the Baboon...Of course, most of us know that the singer/Guitarist/songwriter of Centro-Matic, Will Johnson was the original drummer of the legendary rock and roll band BABOON.

Will Johnson saved my life...Thank you and enjoy...

Amie Mignatti and I went on a tour of the cape point area (which includes the Cape of Good Hope which is the southern most tip of Africa and supposedly where the Atlantic and Indian Oceans meet.) The tour was fun we road bikes along 7 kms of coast, and hiked up the Cape of Good Hope, and took a boat ride past "Seal Island" and said hello to the very smelly seals, and went to "Penguin Beach" and sat down on the beach amongst 200 or 300 funny little "Jack Ass Penguins" - called that because they sound like donkeys.

All of this was fun and exciting, but it was our stop at this beach for lunch where the excitement began. We get off the tour van, and Amie and I were the first 2 (out of 18 people on the tour) to head for the beach. Amie got half way down this small stretch of beach and flopped down in the sand for a nap. I continued along, looking at the ocean, picking up pretty seashells.

An older couple passed me going the opposite direction and we said hello to each other and I continued on and saw their really big dog trotting down the beach after them, and then it changed directions and started heading directly at me, and that was when I realized that it was not a large dog, but a huge fucking Baboon!!!

I headed straight for the water, hoping Baboons don't like to swim, which I guess this one doesn't because he turned from me and starts heading straight for the sleeping Mignatti. I yelled "Amie, Please look up!!" not wanting to scream "AMIE!! BABOON ATTACK!!" which would have made her start screaming and probably make the damn thing go for the kill.

PAGE ONE
INTERVIEW: Dan Savage
FEATURE: Hard Pope
FEATURE: That's Entertainment!
FEATURE: Corn Mo Tour Diary
FEATURE: The Baboon Knew
QUIZ: The Mixed Tape Adventure
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